Chapter 136 - He Needed To Know
Keith wasn\'t sure how he could tell but Joss was upset about something. Something that went beyond her inability to do a lot of things because of her knee. She frequently looked like she was about to say something before backing down.
What was it? What did she want to tell him but felt like she couldn\'t?
Every time he tried to ask she said she was fine or just tired or in pain. She would never give him the real reason and he was getting frustrated.
How was he supposed to help her if he didn\'t know what was going on? He wanted to help her. Seeing her upset was incredibly distressing. There was something about seeing a normally calm person on edge that makes you feel the same way.
Joss wouldn\'t let him help her on an emotional level since he already was on a physical one by doing the things she currently couldn\'t. She probably didn\'t want to burden him but he didn\'t see it that way.
Having an emotional connection with someone was a privilege not a burden. A scary one, to be sure, but a privilege nonetheless.
Keith had never had that before. He never let anyone in like this before. He had shared more of his vulnerability with her than he had with anyone who actually knew who he was. Frostine didn\'t count because of the anonymity between them.
He was going to have to keep trying. He wanted to get closer to Joss. He wanted to understand her completely and let her know how wonderful she was. Giving up here wasn\'t an option even if he was frustrated.
After he finished his training one Saturday night he needed to go check on her so he changed into his costume and used his powers to get across town quicker as he often did. This time he briefly stopped to pick something up for her at the store that he only just remembered she requested and ran into MultiMan on his way out.
He was eating a burrito and seemed equally surprised to see him. "Delta! I thought something happened to you too. No one has seen you in weeks."
"I\'ve had some personal stuff to deal with. Still do, in fact. I\'m here on an errand for someone but the subway was too slow." He frowned as something about the other hero\'s wording occurred to him. "Too?"
"Frostine got hurt pretty badly a few weeks ago. I helped her get to an ambulance but I haven\'t seen her since so I assume she broke something important. I would have thought you knew but if you\'ve been off the grid too it makes more sense that you don\'t."
Keith gaped at him. "Frostine got hurt?! What happened?"
MultiMan shrugged. "I\'m not sure exactly since I got there after it happened. A villain was encased in ice but I couldn\'t see her anywhere. She ended up being trapped on the ground in an alleyway behind the ice. She wasn\'t the most talkative because of the pain and didn\'t tell me how she got hurt.
"I got her over the ice wall and waited with her for the ambulance to show up. Haven\'t seen or heard from her since but it looked pretty bad with how heavily she was bleeding and how swollen her knee was."
Keith\'s heart nearly stopped. "Her knee?!"
"Yeah. The left one."
Frostine\'s left knee. Joss hurt her left knee too around the same time. And sometimes he thought the two of them were so similar it drove him crazy until he dismissed it. What if he hadn\'t been crazy? What if they were similar because they were the same person?
"Is that so?" he said faintly.
MultiMan nodded since his mouth was full of burrito. When he swallowed he spoke again. "Uh huh. I hope she\'s alright and that she was able to get someone to take her home from the hospital. I offered to go with her but she said she would be fine on her own."
That certainly sounded like Joss. Refusing help because she didn\'t want to bother anyone.
His friend was struggling because she wasn\'t busy anymore. What had she been busy with? Was it being a hero? Helping people for her job and with all of her free time?
That sounded like her too. She gave so much of herself to others without ever thinking of herself. And so did Frostine based on that one conversation they had about her only wanting to help.
They were both altruistic. Or maybe it was just one of them that was altruistic because they had been the same person the entire time.
A thought hit him like a truck. Joss\'s distraction lately. Was it because she knew he was Delta? She had figured out who Mercury was; he already knew she was good at putting clues together when she had them.
If she was Frostine she knew him as both Delta and Keith. He had asked both of them for career advice around the same time. She could have put it together from that with how smart she was. And he had only been using generics! It would explain why she didn\'t want to say what was bothering her even using those if that was how she figured him out. She wouldn\'t have wanted the same thing to happen to her.
But why? Why would it matter if he knew who she was unless she didn\'t trust him? But if she didn\'t trust him why would she keep spending time with him and let him into her apartment so often even if she was desperate?
Keith nearly died of mortification when he remembered that he had told Frostine he liked his best friend. And she not only cried but blushed after that. The first real reaction he had ever gotten out of her aside from the time he made her mad by insinuating he thought she was boring.
Her reaction would make a lot more sense if she was Joss. She knew she was his best friend.
Had it been because she was embarrassed or because she was moved? He wracked his brains trying to think back on that conversation but couldn\'t remember much about it since it had kind of been all over the place.
"Delta?" MultiMan asked.
He had finished his burrito and was looking at Keith like he was stupid for not responding. Maybe he was. Maybe he was the biggest idiot on the planet for not realizing what was going on sooner.
His only two friends were the same person. Sure, he knew them in vastly differing contexts, but shouldn\'t he have noticed that before now?!
"Sorry. I was spacing out. Worrying about Frostine, you know?"
"I\'m worried about her too. If you somehow manage to get in contact with her be sure to let me know she\'s doing alright," MultiMan said.
Hysterical laughter bubbled up that Keith forced down. If he managed to get in contact with her, huh? He was fairly certain he was on his way to see her right this minute.
"…sure. Thanks for helping her out."
"She would have done the same for me. See you around, Delta."
MultiMan headed off and Keith was left with the thought that yes, she absolutely would have. That was simply the sort of person she was. Always helping. Always looking out for everyone else while no one looked out for her.
If Frostine did end up being Joss she had someone looking out for her now whether she liked it or not. She\'d had his back for years and without even realizing it he had hers in her time of need.
He didn\'t know what to do with this information except perhaps die of embarrassment. If Joss knew he liked her why didn\'t she say anything? Was that why she had been so distracted lately? Was that what was bothering her?
If it was because she didn\'t like him back why would she keep saying nice things to him and letting him come over? Or was she afraid of screwing things up as he was and that was the only reason she didn\'t say what she knew? He had to ask her even if it did make things awkward. He needed to know.
Keith rushed off toward her apartment with a fierce determination about him, barely managing to remember to put his outer clothes back on over his costume before sprinting up to her floor. He barged in and found her fiercely concentrating on an origami star. A small pile of them was next to her chair on the ground so she must have been at this a while.
"Joss!"
She looked up at the sound of her name and smiled at him. "Hi, Keith! Look what I\'ve been doing. I was thinking once I finish all of these that I could paint them and put them in a jar as decoration. I got the idea from the internet."
While a tiny part of his brain acknowledged that it was a good thing she was finally trying to make this place more hers he was too focused on what he needed to say to comment on it. He blurted what was on his mind immediately.
"You\'re Frostine, aren\'t you?"