The Villainess and I, her Zombie

Chapter 316: In the back alley

|It went easier than I expected... Why exactly didn\'t he pressed us for getting appraised though? I\'m quite sure that the guild – or some of the staff - have a deal with at least one appraiser that has some ridiculous prices set up for their services.|

To not make things suspicious for Mia who was had the proper appraisal results ready, Zombie went out of the guild as soon as his application was approved and he was given a small, cheaply made emblem to signify his new job.

Of course, the cost of both the application process and the emblem was covered by the extremely underpriced bounty for the goblins.

If Zombie hunted them for money, he would have all the reasons to get upset, but since getting paid was just an addition for training and leveling up he decided – or rather was convinced by Patience – to give it a rest for the moment.

|Although dwarfs don\'t appear in the game too much, they had some lore sprinkled in about them – apparently, they don\'t believe in the system faith and take great offense if someone tries to use the appraisal on them. Kobolds have a much better relationship with them than humans so the guy we were talking to was aware of that and didn\'t felt like testing his luck. You didn\'t realize that he was glancing at your sword with a worried expression?|

|Khahaha! Oh, right. Good thing I didn\'t have to take it out, the handle looks fine but the blade is all rusty and messed up... After all, I picked it up from the goblin\'s nest.|

Zombie\'s shoulders shook from the internal laughter.

Then the boy straightened his back and looked around – he couldn\'t see much because of his meager height, but still.

|Say... how lucky do you think you are?|

"...?"

Suddenly, there was a change in Patience\'s voice that made Zombie tilt his head in confusion.

|I\'m not sure about my LUC in this form since we both agreed that getting appraised and revealing my race – which then I wouldn\'t be able to hide my age – and both level and skills way too strong for my age would be a very stupid move on my part... But that\'s not really what you\'re talking about right...?|

Zombie squinted his eyes and asked without opening his mouth.

|There is a thing with one of the special characters... And we just so happen to be at the right place at the right time... It\'s not a proper storyline event or anything so you shouldn\'t have any memories about that, but... do you want to test out your luck on a completely RNG-based chance...?|

Patience asked sounding as if they were hiding something.

|Would it kill you to say things how they are or are you trying to imitate how Cranberry was...?|

The boy in oversized armor who managed to register as an adventurer while posing as a banished dwarf was losing his patience while talking with the being sealed inside of him.

|...something will happen in the back alley not far from here, and if the luck is on your side you will lock Caramel out of pulling off the infinite damage glitch without killing any important characters. Are you in or not?|

But Patience apparently wasn\'t going to either answer or fully explain anything and instead feed Zombie with just a little bit of information.

|You win, where should I go?|

Still... that bit of information was actually all that it took to convince the boy to stop asking questions.

|Good, first of turn right and follow the...|

…

…...

After a few minutes, Zombie found himself in an abandoned alleyway in the back of the shopping district, hiding behind a corner while a surprisingly large group of people were sneaking by on the other end.

"..."

Zombie furrowed his brows while taking a peek at the group.

Only two people there were adults while the rest – around twelve or so – were children.

"Remember, a high-level sneak skill is invaluable for a good spy – even if you are confident in your appearance steal, one day you might find yourself in a situation where it will be useless."

One of the adults explained in a hushed voice to the children listening to him with great attention.

"For example, if you were found out on spying at some important figure and got chased down into a dead-end area – a high enough sneak level would allow you to hide in plain sight while appearance skill will get you captured or killed."

They explained while they were passing through.

|Envy family...?|

Zombie asked in confusion.

The image he had about Envys\' was rather poor with them being overconfident, lying, beauty stealing, lazy bastards, who were weak to boot.

But those people in the ally felt completely different.

The focus and dedication were almost palpable.

|The branch family of the Envy family – so the ones who actually support the kingdom with their skills. You know, the ones who separated from the main family many years back and only share their family name. Those are also the ones who don\'t have to worry about the consequences of taking a saying \'keeping it in the family\' a bit too literal.|

Patience was ready to let Zombie in on the game lore as always.

|Oooh... So that\'s why the ones from the main family were looking like that...? Eww... anyway, those ones here are part of the good ones who pressured the queen about Cranberry and me in the previous playthrough, right?|

|Right.|

Zombie asked and Patience confirmed.

|What\'s so special about them then?|

|Absolutely nothing. They are just on their way to a lesson about some internal affairs.|

|Huh...?|

Zombie asked and was taken by surprise by Patience\'s voice sounding as if they shrugged their shoulders indifferently.

*^$%%%^&^%^&^%^&*

The few last children and the other adult from The Envy\'s group were almost out of the alley when an odd hum filled the air.

It was quiet yet it was hard to miss since it didn\'t really sound like something from this world.

"!!!!"

|Ah, there it is.|

Patience breathed out in relief at the same time as Zombie localized the source of the strange noise – a warped and distorted space in the very middle of the abandoned alley.

|What the hell is that supposed to be...?!|

Zombie gasped internally staring intently at the distortion.

|There\'s an interesting bit of information about the game\'s development. While developing it, a few lines of code written by an intern somehow managed to cause a glitch where a bugged character taking on the appearance of random people would appear and attach itself to one of the capture targets. There was even a chance that they won\'t appear at all. The devs found it interesting so they tested a few things and decided to use some of its unique features and make it into an actual character – of course after imposing a few rules so that the character wouldn\'t break the game. But despite their efforts, as long as that character spawned, the players always managed to use it to pulls off more than a few completely unbalanced glitches allowing for some ridiculous exploits.|

*plop*

As Patience was talking inside Zombie\'s head, something materialized from the distortion and flopped on the ground.

"...?"

Zombie raised his brows, looking at the completely featureless body of a short humanoid that essentially looked like a life-sized version of the body model that artists would use when coming up with poses.

|Alright... it has the biggest chance to follow the voices of the Envys\' and attach itself to Claymore later on. Go on, approach it now, and try to get it to stick to you instead.|

Patience encouraged the shocked boy.

|Wait...! You can\'t be serious...! Are you telling me that this is...?|

Zombie shook his head and stared wide-eyed at the featureless figure slowly getting up at their wobbly feet like a newborn lamb.

|Yes, your guess it\'s correct. This is the character that allowed the failed savior to get both Radiance and Cinnamon, aka Nomannic, into her party. You wouldn\'t guess that this is its base form, right?|

Patience giggled mischievously while simultaneously sounding incredibly proud of themselves for some reason.

|Go on, try your luck and say hello to Kopia!|